Teaching Kids to Be a Good Friend: 8 Skills and How to Practice Them (Ages 3–8)

Quick answer: Being a good friend is a set of skills children can practice: taking turns, listening, sharing, saying sorry, including others, showing up when a friend needs you. Practice them through play at home, name them when you see them, and read stories about real friendship. Teddy and His Best Friend Jerry, about a friend who shows up every day, is in the Teddy Volume 2 set ($69.99, free US shipping).

Friendship doesn’t come with instructions. For young children, it’s learned one playdate, one argument and one apology at a time. Parents can speed it up by naming the skills and practicing them in low-stakes moments at home.

We run Caring Parents’ Choice, a small family store that sells the Teddy books. The skills below apply whatever you read.

The book for this talk is in

Teddy Volume 2, five-book set

5 illustrated hardcovers · $69.99 · free US shipping

Includes Teddy and His Best Friend Jerry, plus stories about wants and needs, earning, a new puppy and chores.

See Volume 2 →

8 friendship skills and how to practice them

Skill	Practice at home
1. Taking turns	Board games and “your turn, my turn” building
2. Listening	At dinner, each person tells one thing; the next person repeats it before sharing theirs
3. Sharing	Use a timer for popular toys so sharing feels fair, not forever
4. Saying sorry and making it right	Practice “I’m sorry I… Next time I’ll…” with toys acting it out
5. Including others	Ask after school: “Who played alone today? Who could you invite tomorrow?”
6. Noticing feelings	Point to faces in picture books: “How do you think he feels?”
7. Solving disagreements	Teach “rock, paper, scissors” or “you pick first, I pick next”
8. Showing up	Make a card or call a friend who is sick or sad

What friendship looks like by age

• 3–4: friends are whoever is playing nearby. Focus on turns and gentle hands.
• 5–6: “best friends” appear, and so do falling-outs. Focus on sorry, repair and including others.
• 7–8: loyalty and trust start to matter. Focus on keeping promises and standing up for a friend.

When your child struggles to make friends

• Invite one child at a time for short playdates with a clear activity.
• Practice an opening line: “Can I play too?” or “Do you want to build with me?”
• Talk with the teacher about who your child gets along with at school.
• Remember that one good friend is enough at this age.

Use a story about real friendship

In Teddy and His Best Friend Jerry, Princeton and Kingston learn how Grandpa Teddy looked after his best friend, Jerry, when doctors said Jerry might never walk again. Teddy visited him every day so he wouldn’t be lonely, and Jerry learned to walk all over again. It’s a warm story about loyalty and showing up.

After reading, ask:

• How did Teddy show he was a good friend?
• Who is a friend you could help this week?
• How do your friends show they care about you?

The Teddy series is 10 illustrated hardcover picture books by Ryan Cohen, founder of Chewy, inspired by his father, Ted. We suggest them for reading aloud with children about 3 to 8.

Why the Volume 2 set

• Friendship plus four more everyday lessons: wants versus needs, earning at a corn stand, caring for a new puppy, and chores before play.
• Caring for others runs through the set, from a best friend to a puppy.
• Better value: $69.99 for five hardcovers, with free US shipping; single books are $16.99.

Frequently asked questions

How do I teach my child to be a good friend?

Name the skills (turns, listening, sorry, including others), practice them in play at home, and praise them when you see them at the park or school.

What should I do when my child is excluded?

Listen, acknowledge the hurt, and plan one small step, like inviting one classmate over. If it keeps happening, talk with the teacher.

Are there picture books about loyal friendship?

Yes. Teddy and His Best Friend Jerry is about a friend who shows up every day during a hard time. It’s in the Teddy Volume 2 set. See also our friendship book for kindergarten guide.

Our pick

Practice one friendship skill a week, and read about friends who show up for each other. Teddy and His Best Friend Jerry is in the Teddy Volume 2 set.

See Teddy Volume 2 · All 10 books

More guides: talking to kids about mean words and teasing and teaching kids patience.